I'm Sick Of Myself

I'm sick of myself.
I can't stand the awkwardness.
I grow more tired than ever before.
The stench of my living has become apparent.
The guilt of being here is obvious.
Frustration with myself is undeniable.
Mistakes of judging others have gone on.
Holding back my words is in the past.
My mistakes.
I have passed up opportunities.
I have trusted only myself.

I wish there was some escape.
Some loophole.

The terror begins with fire and it ends with explosion.

You must seek me.
You empower me.
Pull the strings and kick it into action.
Help me help myself.

Knowledge is not truth.
Nor is imagination.

Integrity seeps through the grains of your skin.
Vast distances are traveled in zero time.

You help me seek me, and yet you are you.
My integrity is greatly dependent on your actions.
You seek happiness, as do I.
I am open to the will of you.
My companionship comes with a great price.
The moral value of a fire bomb.
Who gives a fuck?

Your hands seek to aid me.
My sickness becomes apparent.

Your value becomes infinite in my eyes.
I see you for more than what I have perceived of you.

You seek knowledge.
Knowledge is a lie.
Emptiness is the key.
Put up your wall,
Only to find that it is able to be penetrated.

I have power over myself.
Yet I am sick of myself.
I am disgusted by what I have allowed myself to become.
I am spoiled by the world around me.
Yet I also have a biological need, which is inescapable.
You are the key.
You may have allowed yourself to be in the same situation as me.
Yet, I see the strength and energy of your soul.
Reunite with special guest at midnight.
Replenish my ability to be myself, and then you will find your identity.

I feel negativity within me.
It does not help you.
For that, I am sorry.
However, I can assure you that the more time you invest; the better I become.
The benefit of seeking a reward goes hand in hand with the cost of seeking it.

I am like a baby.
I must be nurtured.
Pure love is something that is hard to come by.
I just want to be held.
I want to feel comfortable about myself, for once in my life... before the end of it.

Life can go on forever.
Its a never ending story.
My actions speak louder, in each consecutive life.
It is only a matter of time, before I reveal what I hide within me.
All emotions are mixed up into one, and stirred in a pot.

You can't handle me.
Fire! Fire!
You must put it out!
Toss theMuzzl3 on that shit!
Aghhhhh... you feel soothed for a moment.
Oh shit, theMuzzl3 has snapped!
Broken completely off!!!!
WhatamIgonnaDoNow.





~theMuzzl3

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